Nice Package

Friday afternoon, as I was slowly trying to put my pants on (putting on pants is one of the hardest things to do with this particular back injury. Underwear extra hard.  I have to dangle it as low as I can get it and then gingerly try to slip my foot through the appropriate hole.), Billy announced that there was a package for me from Get Fit DSM. 

"Great," I muttered, with only one pant leg on, "just add insult to injury." I assumed that the package was something all new get-fitters got, and it would remind me of my pathetic, injured, non-exercising state. 

You've got mail!

But, no. It was full of really nice treats. 

• Smart Water
• Gatorade
• Bananas
• Microwave Popcorn
• and Beer!

Marya also has her own stationary, in which she wrote a sweet note encouraging me to drink lots of water. Not to drink all the beer if I am on painkillers, and drink the Gatorade and eat the bananas if I do drink all the beer. 

All sorts of healing goodness.

I have to say, this is the first care package I have gotten from a fitness instructor. She is also giving me a full credit towards a future session, so I just need to get this back back in action. 

I have gotten so much support and encouragement over the last week.  I have been feeling pretty pathetic and stupid for being injured, but who can feel bad after a visit from the banana and beer fairy?

Disaster! Again.

Do you see that count down? Look, right over there. To your right.

Just 300 odd days until the Copper Triangle.

And, guess where I am?

You'll never guess it.

Nope, guess again.

Close, guess again.

You'll never guess, so here it is.  I am in bed.  And, I have my own special in-bed countdown going.

• Saturday: helped friend wedding dress shop, then went to bed.
• Sunday: tried to go in to work, went to doctor, went to bed.
• Monday: bed, doctor, bed.
• Tuesday: bed.
• Wednesday: went to work, laid on the floor for an hour, went home, went to bed.
• Thursday: day 6 and still in bed, though I do have a Physical Therapy appointment to look forward to.

Why am I in bed, when I should be working and working out?

My stupid f%$King back. That's why.

Last week, I was ready to really get serious. September was supposed to be the "getting back on track: month. I signed up for Goldie's Fit Camp class which would ensure 5 weeks of Monday, Wednesday, Friday 5am workouts. I also went to spin class on Tuesday, and trekking on Thursday, with a bike ride thrown in on Wednesday. Sounds great, right? Like I am right on track.

Nope, I have a stupid, mutinous back that refuses to cooperate.

I was doing side-squats on the BOSU ball on Friday when I felt it zing me, but it didn't hurt so bad, so I kept going. Later we did step ups on a box that was probably too high for me and it. really. hurt. I made it through the rest of the workout, but I knew I was hurt.

"That's okay," I said to myself. "You can take it easy this weekend and be ready for next week."

Wrong-oh. My back just kept getting worse. I stood throughout the entire wedding dress fitting because sitting caused so much pain. On Sunday, I actually cried driving to work, it was so painful. I went to Urgent Care and when the doctor told me to hop down from the table, I seriously thought I would pass out. My back is not f&%king around.

I went to my regular doctor on Monday, because the meds they gave me at Urgent Care were doing nothing, so I thought it might be a bit more serious. My doc gave me better meds and prescribed physical therapy. And told me to take it easy.

So, now, instead of actually getting my work done, serving my students, and living a normal life, I am trapped in the bed. It hurts to sit. It hurts to walk. It hurts to stand. It hurts to drive. The only time it doesn't totally hurt is when I am laying flat on my back, in bed. F. M. L.

This is emotional rock bottom.  While I lie here, all I can think of are the dark thoughts:

• I'll never get fit. I can't even work out. I am trapped in this hideous body. I can't lose weight because I can't exercise, but I can't exercise because I get hurt.
• I'll never lose weight because I am trapped in my bad eating habits. I can't escape them. 
• I'm trapped in this life.
• It is all my fault.
• I am totally pathetic and disgusting.
• I might as well give up. 

In fact, maybe I will disband this blog all together and start a blog called, "Double the Rice: Adventures from a Life in Bed." It will include such wacky anecdotes such as "the time the dog stepped on my computer and deleted all my work." Or "sending emails to your boss about not coming in because you are too hurt." Or "how to drink coffee when you can't sit up." 

It just doesn't seem fair. I tried to do something positive for myself. Instead, I ended up hurt. Really hurt. So, why bother?

Yes, I realize this blog is full of self-pity. What did you expect from a blog called "Adventures from a Life in Bed."

The Lounge Dilemma

Won't be reading anymore of this today.

In an attempt to change some of my habits, I relocated my eating from my office to anywhere else.  I also attempted to stop eating in the car and at the coffee table when the other human is not at home, but those aren't going so well.

Not-office-eating is going well.  Sometimes, I will think I want to eat something, then realize I have to stop what I am doing and go to the lounge and eat there, and I just don't eat instead.  

I think it is helping me get a handle on my work-eating-bad-habits, which feels like a win!

There is, always it seems, a downside.  And, that is my lunch is no longer a quiet, solitary time.  Because I am in the lounge, I am fair game for chatting.  Sometimes, this is awesome.  Sometimes, though, you just desperately need to read a book because you have to teach it the next day.  

It's not that I don't like to socialize.  I do, but I need to put lunch-time in the non-productive column for my day's hours and recalculate.  

Goldie Tricked Me!

So we are not speaking to her until the end of this blog...at least. 

As many of the three of you may know, I have sort of been bumbling my way back into fitness.  September is my month for bumbling.  

It especially feels like bumbling, because, it turns out, I need structure.  One of the many creative ways that I talk my self out of working out is if I have to think about it.  "Go to the gym and lift weights" is too vague. Here's what happens in my head: "If you don't know what you are going to do, then you will just wander around, aimlessly.  And, there is nothing worse than a chubby aimless girl wandering around the YMCA weight room." 

So, then I just go home.  Or sleep in.  

One of the best things about H2K was that it was totally auto-pilot.  I had to do murderous work outs, but because someone was telling me what to do, how many to do, and because it was at 5am, it was over before my creative mind could talk myself out it.  

To that end, one of my assignments (hint, hint, upcoming blog!) this week was to "schedule time to schedule and plan workouts."  

Side note: I have yet to do that.  

As I am bumbling, though, I am very susceptible to suggestion.

In the spring, Goldie resigned from H2K for a while to work on her triathlon.  We did some YMCA workouts together, including trekking classes and swim + spin Saturday.  She also took a triathlon class at the YMCA.  Marya also teaches a morning boot camp class.  

The Ad for Fit.

Goldie started going to that.  Then, she rocked the socks off her triathlon.  Thanks, in part, to these classes.

Look at that smile!

Also, she's looking especially foxy lately.  

So, when she invited me to do the fit classes last week, I gave it some serious thought.  I had some serious concerns, mainly because I met Marya at Goldie's triathlon and she is the kind of woman who is just utterly perfect.  Perfect body, perfectly beautiful, perfectly nice.  She kind of scared me. 

You can see her responses.

I didn't decide until last night when I texted her to ask if I could just show up.  She said yes.  

Here's what Colby Park looks like at 4:57am

Here's what I look like at 4:58am.

We met at the tennis court, signed waivers, and then Marya says, "okay, so some of you ran your miles on Friday, but for you new people, we are going to start with that."

[Record scratch]

Wait, I have to run a mile. With other people. Timed. 

As Goldie and this other fit lady peeled away, I was cursing her.  Damn you Goldie!

As she lapped me, I thought of evil Goldie-sabotage, like giving her kid an espresso, or frowning.  That really gets to Goldie.  

But, I [sigh] survived.  I walked just a bit 3-4 times, but mostly jogged.  Then we did a push up test (15!) and crunch test (56!).  These are just starting numbers.  We'll compare in 5-weeks. 

The class includes lots of jumping stuff: jumping crosses, toe taps, butt kickers, cross country skiiers, morguls in the cool "tabata" formula, along with some core work (mountain climbers--merrh.). 

As you know, I am not in love with running and/or movements that require me to coordinate the left and right side of my body.  Also, it's $150--so I have to get $10 worth of butt kicking out of each class.  (Hint: there's something about the $150 mark.)  Also, between me and Colby Park is the best bakery in the city: the Bake Shoppe (oh those monster cookies!). 

The Windsor Heights Gauntlet 

But, on the bright side, I don't have to do any planning or thinking.  Or scheduling time to schedule workouts.

In the end, like other dear blonde friends (Steven!), Goldie has tricked me into something, that, in the end, is probably good for me, or, at least I will remember in 10 years. 

It's 5AM, Do You Know Where Your Treadmill is?

Good morning from the Walnut Creek YMCA. 4:58 is a mad rush outside the Y, with fit suburban mommies all jockeying for position.

Good morning, treadmill.

Why am I here? Well, Trekking is a super popular class. If you want a treadmill, you've got to get up pretty early in the morning, like 15 minutes before class.

Treadmill guarding, in action.

And, since I can't do this class without Goldie, I've got to get here early enough to save her and adjacent treadmill.

She's sick, but she still smiles when I ask for a picture!

What this means: I am working out. And, I am not just phone it in. This class, which I arrived 15 minutes early for is a sweat factory and requires running. Go me. And Goldie.

Trek!

Damn Me and My Rules!

The Long Walk Back to the Lounge for Snacking

I was just about to check my email and eat some radishes, when I decided I needed salt.  Radishes + salt = delicious. 

As I was walking back to the lounge, where I had just retrieved my radishes, I remember: No eating in my office.  So, I opened the cabinet, looked at the salt, and then walked back to my office.  

Now, I am at a critical moment: take the radishes back to the lounge and eat them with salt, or not.  For now, I am choosing not.  

All in all, I think my experiment with not eating in my office has been successful.  I haven't eaten in my office, and I have been eating pretty well.  

So, how did all the other goals go last week?

1. Work out 5 times: Checked.  I worked out every week day, Monday through Friday.  On Monday, I went to spin class AND yoga.  On Thursday, I took a long walk with Goldie (she was tri-tapering). 

2. Eat 90% Good 5 Days Per Week: Semi-check.  Last week was tricky at school.  We had ice cream social, burgers and brats, and Chris Cakes: Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday.  I tried to make those my 10% Bad eating parts of the day and I did reasonably well.  I did follow up my burger (no bun) with some ice cream, though.  The weekend, well, that was another story.

3. Don't Drink Beer Everyday: Check--I didn't drink Monday, Tuesday, or Thursday.  And, on Wednesday, I just had a couple glasses of wine at my sister's house.  Labor Day weekend: different story, but I would say goal achieved!

4. Lose 1.5 Pounds--Half check.  The scale says this happened, but bear season happened in there, so we don't necessarily trust the scale.  Further efforts forthcoming. 

5. 2 Liters of Water a Day--Check for the week, but not over the weekend.  Labor Day apparently was where good intentions go to die.  But drinking all that water was nice.  So I want to keep doing it.  

Goals for this week?  Same as before.  As it is a short week, and Monday as Sunday #2 kind of messed things up we are going to try to continue with the same and then reassess.