Bike, Bike, Bike, Beer, Beer, Beer

As you may know, the Great Bike Ride approaches. After months, and months, and months of waiting, the time is almost nigh.

As the four of you may know, I am in Madison, Wisconsin at a trade show. I could be out wandering the city today, but instead I am trying to absorb air conditioning while I can, and to entertain myself, I read back issues of See Teacher Run. Steven and I lost contact after college-ish, and she's done a lot of wacky stuff in the interim. I've been trying to catch up on the old issues of her blog so that I would understand some of her many and often confusing references. While reading 2008 and half of 2009, I not only fell more deeply in love with Steven and the Mayor, but I also got a little taste of delicious RAGBRAI blogging.

(Side note: the couple that Steven and the Mayor rode with in 2009 are tall and very attractive. Very Boulder-fitster-type. I am feeling a little self-concious. I am definitely more short and Iowa-shaped.)

Then, I decided, I needed to pre-RAGBRAI blog myself. Then, I realized, all my RAGBRAI photos are on my old laptop. Then, I realized, I didn't want to blog without photos, those end up so sad. Then, I realized, I have a select few photos on my phone. So, here is my RAGBRAI preview complete with rarely been seen images from RAGBRAI-past.

What can you say about your first RAGBRAI? You just have no idea what to expect. Needless to say, I was all nerves headed into Sioux City. Thankfully, we found the Mayor and Steven without too much effort. Lexi ate some leftover snacks from the car ride (she always packs her unique blend of road trip food, which always includes cherries, some cheese, and aging cabinet crackers).

You can see the blurry outline of Steven in the margins. Alas, it will just be me and the Mayor for the prologue, as someone needs to tend to the small one. My sister, our newest virgin, won't be joining us until Sunday night.

Another new development for 2011 is that Lexi has a bagger-boyfriend, and if you know anything about baggers, they are cheap and they are mavericks. The Thunda' (from Down Under) couldn't stomach the price tag for Bike World to move Lexi's stuff (and find her campsites). He insisted that he would carry her stuff on his Long Haul Trucker so that she wouldn't have to pay Bike World or register for RAGBRAI.

Now, I have done some complaining about the price taggery of Bike World in the past, and handing over a big chunk of change is always difficult, but I don't fully support the "not paying for RAGBRAI" mentality. Sure, the Register makes a lot of money, and we know that Bike World makes a lot of money, but they also do a ton of work. It just doesn't seem right to not chip in.

Lexi also confinded in me yesterday, as we were wandering around the blistering heat of downtown Madison, that she just might not be able to do the ride if this heat wave didn't break (I love the term "excessive heat warning"). I quickly responded, "oh, well, you could sag..." but then quickly remembered, that no, she wouldn't be able to sag. She wouldn't have any support until she gets herself and her vintage Raleigh back to central Iowa. Bummer.

Then, as we were walking home from dinner last night, she also asked me if I would "stake out a space at the campground" for her, because the The Thunda (who is driving trucks in the deep south; sidenote: did you know that there are heaps and heaps of Aussie truck drivers in the United States?) won't be back until Saturday or maybe Sunday, and she won't be done with work until 6pm, so if I could just stake out some room for her.

My initial reaction was "No! I paid my money! I am not going to wrestle Tight-Ass-Tom in order to secure a bit of extra tent space. You and your man friend are cheap, and the price tag for cheapness is extra work," but I sat on my huffiness when she said, "I want to be near you." Sigh. It's hard not to feel a bit put out, but even if she had paid, I guess I would want to save her some tent space. "Stop being a jerk," I told myself. "You love your cheap-skate bagger friends."

The Mayor and Steven took us downtown to the Sioux City party. I got my first taste of the shuttle and Lexi realized, in horror, that there wasn't going to be a lot of food for a picky vegetarian to eat. But, we ran into our store friend Tobin, who is a doll and a hunk. Later, in Charles City, I remember staring up at the road from the campsite to see Tobin, with his huge speaker trailer rolling into town. His team, Ass-Slap or Slow Motion, or whatever, always makes a great showing at various bike events, including the Urban Assault. Tobin, though, has since left that team because they party too much. Word.

I can't say that I really had the hang of RAGBRAI even as I got on my bike for the ride that morning. We were just out of the "starting gate" when guy goofed his clip-less pedals and fell over. Another guy, trying to see what happened, fell over too. "What the heck is going on?" I thought. People are crashing all over the place; little did I know, I would be one of them.

Here's my first piece of RAGBRAI-pie. I am looking forward to the pie. I read on the RAGBRAI Twitter than all the towns are trying to "out pie" each other. Bring it, I say. This year, I really want to stop for the old-timey steam machine ice cream. I know the line is epic, but I love ice cream. I never got watermelon last year, so I would like some of that too. And, last year, my RAGBRAI-fairy-godfather insisted that we stop for a cookie from some kids. I want to take more advantage of the late afternoon cookie breakie.

I am a little nervous about how the eating will go. For one, I won't have Steven with me. She and I are pretty much on the same page when it comes to what we eat, when we eat, and how much we eat. She is an enthusiastic eater, but she doesn't go over board (she did not attempt to finish peanut butter sandwich 2.0). The Mayor, on the other hand, if I remember right, is kind of a squirrely when it comes to eating. If I remember, he says he wants something, but then changes his mind. I am not sure I really remember him eating much of anything.

For two, my sister, The Emily Show, will be joining us. If the "Altoona Tune-Up" was any indication of how her eating will go, I am terrified. The Emily Show loves to eat, like voraciously. When my mom makes ribs, she not only squirrels away the choicest racks for later eating, she also eats with the ribs in her left hand and a fork posed for stabbing in her other in case someone threatens her plate. She's like a feral animal. We were finishing our little ride into Altoona with a massive headwind, Emily hadn't eaten at our last stop, and as we pulled into a southerly direction, she says to me, "I am so freaking hungry. I need some protein. If I see a rabbit, I am going to dive for it." By the time we got to a Casey's she was literally shaking.

Here's some video evidence; excuse my drunken giggling in the background.

For three, Lexi will be with us for the first three days. The Thunda will be with us for the whole week, off and on in his cheap-skate-bagger fashion. (He has also proclaimed that he won't be getting out of bed until 10am and he's going to "kick my ass.") Both the Thunda' and Lexi are picky eaters, but they are picky in opposite ways. Lexi is kind of weird about eggs, but the Thunda will eat 3 omelets a day (he is a very strapping young man). The Thunda only likes Guinness and Moscow Mules, Lexi doesn't eat meat.

Many, it's one thing to not have compatible riding styles. It's another to not have compatible eating styles.

Here's Lexi the day of the crash. Isn't she cute? You gotta love a girl who can look that good after helmets, and sweat, and me beeching and moaning.

Here's Steven and Gorgeous Adam from Team Awesomeness. Team Awesomeness will be out in full force. We had some beers with Bating and Jay hooked them up with a driver for their van. Keep your eyes out for these guys on the ride. Their team kits are amazing; guys, can we get a lady's version next year???

One of the things I am looking forward to the most on RAGBRAI is seeing so many cool people: obviously the Mayor and Steven (and meeting the Small One!), and spending the week with The Emily Show, Lexi, and the Thunda, and Team Awesomeness, and my Beaverdale Bicycling friends, Ed and Jen Veak (also baggers!), and family, and Batman, and, who knows, maybe even Spandex Mike! Bicycle Cycling has given me so much in the last year, and one big thing is awesome friends

Clear Lake meant swimming and inside showers and beds after a long, hot, windy day of riding. This year, we are looking forward to the same royal treatment in Atlantic, where my aunty Vinnie, who lives in Anita has volunteered to hook us with some dinner, some showers, and maybe some hot tub, along with a ride. In Carroll, my Auntie Sue will welcome us with open arms for dinner, showers, beds, and a pool! I heard a rumor that the mother of the Mayor might have us over in Altoona as well.

Finally, here's my accommodations from last year. Notice the ubiquitous neon sports bra! We had fabulous weather last year, with the exception of one really windy day and one rainy morning. I know I need to reign (ha ha) in my expectations about the weather, and a lot of things.

My first RAGBRAI was so magical. I didn't know what to expect, but everything was delightful. This year, I am trying not to compare with last year. It will be fun, but it will be different, and that's okay. It's not the RAGBRAI that's fun or unfun, it's the attitude.

So, here's to pie, and friends, and Leann's emails, and riding in the rain, and "coming in hot," and "fire in the hole," and meeting guys with Kevlar jackets, and Coors Light, and camping, and riding bikes all day, and catching up and corn. Happy RAGBRAI to me.

Cheer! What are You Waiting for?

So, I've been avoiding the old blog lately. I've been avoiding a lot of things. But, after reading the hilarious/inspiring/just-too-darn-cute of my fellow-lady bloggers, Steven/H-Bomb/Marthy, I figured it was about time to climb back into the old blogger saddle. You ladies make me laugh/want-to-suck-it-up-and-be-awesome/proud.

I am blogging this blog from beautiful, though steamy, Madison, Wisconsin. I am at a trade show with my friends, Lexi and Jay, who are buying lots of cool stuff for Back Country Outfitters. The show is amazing. First, it's held in a the Frank Lloyd Wright designed Monona Terrace, right on the lake. Outside folks are running, cycling, skiing, and boating around the lake. The show room is freaking bursting with colorful clothes, cutting-edge gear, and shoes for various adventures. There's a gal who is wearing an orthopedic boot because she pulled her tendon, so she bedazzled it. Amazing.

Have I mentioned, I love gear?


(Look at that lake! That white speck is a speedboat where two young guys are swimming.)

My duty at the show is to (wo)man the Campership Silent Auction. Lexi and I help raise money for the ORA (Outdoor Reps Association) Campership Fund, which raises money to send kids to wilderness camps.

And, it's hard not to be pretty happy. Sales Reps are charming, easy-to-talk to, and they love to have fun. The product all around me is designed to help get people outside and having fun, and I am raising money to get kids to camp. Camp is awesome!

I needed this.

Back in the Big D I was feeling pretty low, though, I am not exactly sure why. Maybe it's because I am not busy enough this summer; maybe my expectations for how this summer would be were too high; maybe I am just an emotional little creature that needs to think seriously about better living through chemistry: I don't know.

I do know that I've been not working out as much as I want to. And, I have been eating my feelings. And, when I don't do and do do those things, I get kind of bummed out, which makes me not work out and eat my guilt for dinner. RAGBRAI is looming, and no matter how much I ride and tweak my bike, I am not as fast as I once was. What will the mayor think?

I am not looking for sympathy. I am just trying to figure things out.

In my efforts, I've been looking (though not very hard) for a professional to talk to other than my personal trainer. I am trying not to use Gwyn as a therapist during our workouts. Instead, I have been trying to cool the chatting and really work hard. (It's working. I am still sore from our Monday suffer-fest, and now I know my ventilory threshold.) When she asked how I was doing, instead of saying, "I've been bad," I tried to re-frame my response, "I haven't been successful at taking care of myself as I would like."

Now, I'm thinking, I needed the mental-martini shaker of travel to get me out of my funk. For the first time this summer, I am busy. I left for Madison on Monday night, and I won't be back until Thursday. I leave for RAGBRAI on Saturday. When I get back, I will head to Lake City to celebrate the birthday of Lady Di(ana). Then I have a week before the White Tiger and I head to Portland for a little vacation, then a family wedding, then school starts.

All of a sudden, things are picking up. I am busy, too busy to worry about nonsense like "am I ready for RAGBRAI?" Who cares? It's not like I am going to skip it. And, between hanging out with Steven, and meeting the small one, and reuniting with my RAGBRAI husband, and spending time with my sister, and Lexi, and her Bruce-beau, the Thunder, and Jen and Ed, and Team Awesomeness (also known as Team ExtremeHotness), and "that's it, I'm going 7," and Coors Light, and eating pie for breakfast, and camping, I am going to have an awesome time.

I am going too busy to worry about "when will I get my work done for the fall semester?" I'll get it done. Maybe I am not working out as hard or as much as I would like, maybe my eating isn't perfect, meh? I can always do better and in the meantime my job is to work hard and enjoy my life. Things that I haven't done aren't failures, they are opportunities to do better.

At one point, I told the White Tiger I was feeling depressed. He responded, "just snap out of it." At first, I thought he was crazy/insensitive. Now, though, surrounded by all this fit, healthy, happy people, all this fun product, and delicious Wisconsin food and drink, it seems silly to sit waste time sitting around being depressed.

And, as a little treat for reading all my depression chow-chow, I am going to give you a little dose of puppy-cuteness. That's a play out of the old Smither's Handbook. I feel like I have to compete with the cuteness happening over at "Here We Go" and "Some Girls Prefer Carnations."















)(Here's little Miss Holiday, with her bestest friend in the whole world, my sister Emily, who, I swear, speaks puppy.)

And, look for updates from updates from RAGBRAI, the most magical day of the week. My sister bought a solar charger, so maybe, just maybe, I will be able to use the Droid.

SBVSBC: Forfiet or Lose or Whatever

So, as of this moment, I am in the lead for the SBVSBC, but alas, it is a false victory. The points lie, because I have not been subtracting my 10 points per cocktail, per my new "rules." And, there have been cocktails. Nor, has Steven or Super Saver or Wump updated their points for the end of June. Nor, have I been that awesome. Nor, am I embarking on my reward-journey to Boulder, and even if I were, I probably would be a hurting unit, because, like I said, I have not been awesome.

I called Panda a week ago to break the news about the cancellation (or possible postponement) of the 4th of July Boulder 100 Bikes and Beers Brewery Adventure for Freedom (4oJB100BBBAF). As we discussed the massive breakdown of the SBVSBC, I think she put it best when she said, "we are awesome for two weeks. We should just make our challenges two weeks long."

True that.

Our other alternative is going to be a simple "Awesomeness Challenge." Every day we will attempt to do something, anything, that we deem awesome and then calculate our awesomeness points. Bike ride to the bar = 4 billion awesomeness points; teach Small One to stand on legs = 100k awesomeness points. Clean bathroom = 105 awesomeness points. And, the goal will be to get to 100 Billion Awesomeness points. Sounds fun, huh?

Our silly little challenges are all about high expectations for awesomeness. I think each of us secretly believes that we are going to super-rock the challenge, and we try. And, when you think about it, we are pretty awesome. Maybe we are not as awesome as we had thought we might be, but compared to our baseline of awesomeness, we are more awesome than before. And trying is awesome too.

It's July now. And, I don't think I am the only one that goes into the summer with high expectations for productivity, for fitness, for fun, for a sun tan, nor do I think that I am the only one who is slightly disappointed with the results so far. I love to make the joke, but it's kind of true, that the secret to happiness is low expectations.

So rather than be bummed about losing the SBVSBC, like I lost the RAGBRAI Royalty Challenge last year, (am I really 0-2?), I am going to try to remember how awesome I was during those first two weeks, and bring some of that unadulterated awesome to the rest of my summer.

I am also going to just try to have fun. I am going to try to do the things that make me happy, and not worry so much if I am doing enough. Being productive makes me happy. Riding my bike makes me happy. Visiting my friends makes me happy. Beer and barbeques make me happy. If I can get all that stuff accomplished, awesome. If I can get some of it accomplished, awesome. If I just have a fun and restful summer, totally awesome.